Futurama

Fan Fiction

It Never Lasts, part 5
By Go-a-Green-a

Wedding Plans

Fry groaned, sitting back on the couch with a wedding magazine in his hands while Michelle blabbed on and on and on about the kind of wedding she wants.

"...and I want red roses, white roses and blue roses for the bouquet and..."

Fry stopped her. "I don't think there's a such thing as blue roses."

Michelle rolled her eyes. "It's the future, Fry! Just pay someone to genetically engineer some."

"But that could cost-"

"I want blue roses, Fry!" The glare she gave made Fry flinch.

"Fine. I'll write it down." He picked up a pen and pad of paper and wrote: "Note to self: get rid of Michelle." He put the note in his pocket. He wasn't sure how he would get rid of Michelle but he knew he had to do it- before the wedding so he wouldn't have her as his last love before the DOOP forces came to pick him up. Apparently just about everyone in New New York had been drafted-including Leela. Not Michelle of course, though. She always seemed to have better luck.

Fry looked over at her- the biggest pain imaginable- as she started to rant yet again about wedding plans.

"Okay so I was thinking that we could get married at the Madison Cube Garden and..."

"Whoa, whoa there! The garden costs a hundred thousand a night to rent!"

Michelle looked him in the eyes. "But there can be no price to our love...."

Fry groaned again. "There's limits, though! I don't have a hundred thousand dollars!"

"Then why don't you go and get it." She glared at him once more. The same "I'll kill you if you don't do it" kind of look. 

Fry shuddered, not wanting to die before he had to. "Fine! I'll get the money." Now he really needed to get rid of her. What am I going to do?

And Then Came Sean

Leela paced back and forth in her apartment. "Great. Now I'm stuck with Sean. Fry's marrying Michelle, we both got drafted to the DOOP forces and Bender's stealing more than usual...." She sighed, remembering the note she wrote for Fry. She had dropped it in the hallway, he must have seen it. "Well my life's just going peachy." She mumbled sarcastically. "Stupid Sean..."

Just then there was a knock on the door.

"Its unlocked." Leela called and Sean stepped in. "Speak of the Devil...."

"What?"

"You! You're the cause of all this! If you hadn't shown up at the theater then I wouldn't have to watch Fry get married to his bossy ex girlfriend in a couple weeks!" She took a step towards him.

Sean took a step back. "Michelle would have shown up anyway...."

Leela narrowed her eye. "How do you know her name's Michelle?"

"Well I-"

"You set this up, didn't you?" She was just about ready to knock him out when he spoke.

"Look, I can explain, Leela!"

She crossed her arms. "You'd better."

"Well I just got dumped by my old girlfriend and was wandering by Planet Express, wondering if I could get them to deliver me some amnesia pills to make her forget she dumped me when I saw you in the window." He paused. "Mind if we sit down... its kind of a long story..."

Leela sat down on the couch. "Fine. Now get explaining before I knock your teeth out."

"Okay, okay. So I walked into the building- apparently you guys don't have very good security because I was able to make it to the Employee lounge with out any problem- and I waited outside the door for a moment. I heard someone talking so I decided to listen."

"Stinking eavesdropper...." Leela mumbled, arms still crossed.

Sean ignored the comment and continued. "It was the orange-haired guy- Fry. Sounded like he was asking someone out so I was about to leave, figuring there was no point in listening when I heard your voice answer. Once I found out where you were going and when I figured I'd try and get you back that way- by "meeting" you there."

Leela gasped. "You... you..."

Sean sighed. "Let me tell the rest of the story before you explode. I ran back to my ex girlfriend, Michelle." Leela looks at him, disbelieving. "Oh yeah. Did I mention that Michelle was my ex? 'Cause that's kind of important.... so anyway, after she finished screaming at me I told her my plan- she agreed, saying that she needed a new boyfriend soon and if Fry was her only choice then so be it."

Leela just stared.

"So we devised our plan and the next day I met up with you at the theater."

"God... Do you want to be killed?"

Sean chuckled which made Leela clench her fists. No, I just really thought it might work, until I messed up a couple minutes ago. Besides it probably wouldn't have worked out anyway....You liked Fry too much and wouldn't forget me dumping you."

"You didn't dump me. You tried to then I just decided to leave."

"whatever. It doesn't matter now. We'll all die in Zapp's war."

"Not Michelle. She didn't get drafted. The lucky b-"

"Whoa there, she didn't get drafted 'cause she slept with the head officer."

Leela's eyes went wide. "She slept with Zapp!?

Sean laughed again. "She'll sleep with anyone to get out of getting her hands dirty."

"But Zapp!?"

"You did too."

"And how the hell do you know that?"

He shrugged. "We've all read his blog, Leela. He posted it twelve times and in bold, flashing lettering."

"Lovely." she sighed.

"Well if that's all then I'll be going. Too bad it didn't work out with us. All that fake tan and spray-on muscles for nothing.... Well at least I won't be the only lonely one." He gave her a sideways glance and smirked. "See ya." He started to walk out when Leela called.

"Wait." she said. Sean turned just in time to receive a powerful punch to his jaw. He passed out cold on the floor of the hallway. "Told you I'd knock your teeth out," Leela said before slamming the door shut.

The Hundred Thousand Dollar Dilemma

Fry paced back and forth, wondering what to do. God, what do I do? He racked his brain trying to think of something. Now you're in a mess... stupid Michelle, stupid Sean, stupid Zapp, stupid... everything.... He sighed. Okay think, Fry, think! You have to get rid of Michelle or you're going to have to find a hundred thousand dollars with only two and a half weeks to do it! "Oh, man thinking is hard!"

"Don't blow a fuse." Bender said as he entered the lounge.

"You're still not helping!"

"Didn't get rid of her yet, eh, meatbag?"

"No. Now she wants a wedding at the Madison Cube Garden! I just can't get rid of her!"

Bender took a puff from his cigar. "Well, if asking her to marry you didn't work then try simply being a jerk."

"Or you could just say you can't handle this now." Amy suggested as she walked in.

"Amy? How much did you hear." Fry said, spinning around.

"Pretty much everything."

"Oh... um, okay then."

Bender flicked on the TV and sat on the couch. "Being soft never works. Dump her and dump her hard."

Amy sighed. "Well if you want a mortal enemy then go for it but if not try to let her down easy."

"That doesn't work with Michelle. If she wants to get married she will..."

"Still, do you really think Bender's advise is better?"

"Okay fine. I'll let her down easy."

"Good, then I'll be going. Got a date with Kif tonight." She reached for her purse but found nothing. "Where'd it- Bender!"

Bender looked up innocently. "What? It wasn't me, it was Scruffy!"

"Who's Scruffy?"

Scruffy walks by with a broom, hearing Amy's comment. "The janitor." He says, scratches his mustache then walks out.

Amy glared at Bender.

"Fine. Here." He pulled Amy's purse out of his chest and grumbled to himself.

As Amy left, Michelle entered, walking over to Fry.

"There's a storm comin'." Bender mumbled, sitting back to watch what Michelle might do.

"There you are! You left without telling me!" Michelle narrowed her eyes and clenched her fists.

Fry scratched his head, trying to think. "I was just, uh... sleep-walking and I ended up here." 

"sleep-walking at 12 noon?"

"Yeah... I get, uh, tired really quickly."

"Well I guess that's true." Michelle crossed her arms. "So when are you going to get money for the wedding."

"Yeah about that, um... I was just thinking and, uh, I was wondering if maybe we could call off the wedding-"

"WHAT?" Michelle took a step towards him.

"For now! Just for now, I mean I'm not sure I can make a hundred thousand dollars in just two and a half weeks and-"

Michelle glared at him. "No, the wedding is ON! We will NOT postpone it so you'll just have to go and get the money one way or another!"

"Okay then. I'm uh... I'm gonna go now..." Fry hurriedly runs over to the door.

Bender glanced at Michelle. "You're just the life of the party, ain't ya, honey."

Michelle growled and stormed out of the room.

"Watch out New New York! Hurricane Michelle's on a rampage!" Bender said as he sat back on the couch.

Just Don't Axe

Leela walked over to the Planet Express Building, wondering how she was going to confront Fry when Michelle stopped her.

"Ugh, everyone's being so rude today, I won't bother asking anyone else but you, so will you help me pick out a wedding dress?"

Leela bit her lip. "You know I'm really not the right person to axe..."

"I know. Its obvious that you have absolutely no sense of style but everyone else is being a jerk so..."

Leela groaned. "Fine, I'll help." She said through clenched teeth.

"Great, come on then." She grabbed Leela's arm and headed off.

Meanwhile...

Hermes, the Professor, Zoidberg and Scruffy are sitting at the table at PE.

Hermes tapped the table, looking around. "Is it just me or is Planet Express more empty than usual today?"

Back to Leela

The store clerk looked to Michelle. "So what kind of dress are you looking for?"

"Traditional white wedding gown." She replied.

"White? Are y-" Leela started but Michelle glared at her. "Okay. White."

"We have a lovely selection. Right this way, miss." The clerk said, walking over to a corner of the store, full of white, glimmering dresses. "I'll leave you to look around." He walked off somewhere in the maze of dresses.

"Well, pick one." Leela said to Michelle, taking a seat on the bench.

"I can't just pick one! I have to try them on."

Leela groaned and watched Michelle model dress after dress, each more extravagant then the next.

"What about this one?"

"Good."

"That's what you said for all of them!"

"Look, it doesn't matter what you wear its what's inside that counts."

"Well it matters to me!"

"That's 'cause inside you're just as self-centered as you look..." Leela mumbled.

"What was that?"

"I said it looks really good, you should buy it." Leela said, rolling her eye.

"Alright I will." She looked at the tag. "Five thousand dollars? Oh well. I'll get Fry to get the money."

Leela just stared. "But he's already paying for the whole wedding!"

"Fine! I'll buy it myself! But that's all."

"what about the veil?" Leela asked, holding up a glittery wedding veil.

Michelle snatched the veil from Leela's hands. "Okay, that too. But nothing else!" She went back to the changing rooms to change out of the dress and back into her normal clothes.

Leela decided not to mention the matching shoes so she just placed them on the counter with the rest of the bridal ensemble.

The clerk rang up the dress, veil and shoes. "That'll be $5264."

Michelle grumbled to herself but paid for it anyway. "...Last stinking time I pay for anything...."

Money Woes

Fry paced up and down the hallway at PE, not knowing what to do about his money and Michelle problems. "What do I do, What do I do, what do I do!?"

"Why don't you gag her, put her in a burlap sack and throw her into the river?" Bender suggested as he entered the hallway.

"I don't think I really want the police after me for that...."

Bender sighed. "Baby." He muttered.

"Look, if you don't have any better advice then-"

"Okay, okay. Well if you don't wanna be a jerk or have the police on your case then...." He thought for a moment. "Then you're screwed. Well I'll be off now, I need to go help a friend get his insurance money." He pulled a gasoline tank out of his chest and walked off, whistling.

"Yeah, thanks for the advise, Bender. I really appreciate it." Fry said sarcastically.

"No problemo, Wiggles!" Bender called as he walked out the door.

"But I still need to find a hundred thousand dollars by the end of next week!"

Just then the professor came shuffling down the hallway, a gold robot following him at a short distance. "I need to get rid of this infernal butler!"

"More caviar, sir?" The golden butler asked.

"I don't want anymore caviar, you moron! Go to Hell!" The professor shouted, waving his arms.

"Why don't you sell it?" Fry suggested.

"I'm too busy! I need a nap! None of your business!"

"Could I have it?"

"Oh, fine, just take it! I don't know why I built it to begin with...." He paused, then looked around. "Where am I? Oh well, off to go build my solid gold butler! Toodle-oo!" He shuffled back the way he came, leaving Fry with the robot butler.

"Alright, now all I have to do is sell you and I'll have the money in no time!"

"More caviar, sir?"

"No, thanks. I'm good."

"More caviar, sir?"

"I said: No, thanks!"

"More caviar, sir?"

"No! Shut up!" Fry hit the robot on its head but the only damage he managed to do was to his hand. "Ow!"

"More caviar, sir?"

"Ugh, selling you might just be harder than I thought...."

"More caviar, sir?"

War Troubles

"Well, Kif. How many people do we have now for our war?" Zapp asked, sitting in the captain's chair aboard the Nimbus.

"Wars." Kif sighed.

"Right. Wars. So how many?"

"Sir, we've recruited just about all of Earth, Trisol and several other planets."

"Good. And how many do our enemies have?"

"Well, we happen to be against the entire Omecronian Empire and fighting six different wars with them at once."

"Yes, well I knew that. And four armies each you say?"

Kif sighed. "Yes."

"Alright then. I say we have enough recruits now. When does this whole... war-thingy begin, again?"

"About two weeks from now."

"Ah good, that means there's still time the kick back and relax before the loud war cries drown out the sweet sound of Duran Duran on the radio."

"Um, sir. Can I just ask you one favor?"

"Hmm. Well I am in a generous mood today. Shoot."

"Um.. could you maybe think of taking my girlfriend- Amy Wong- o-out of the war? And... maybe just d-dropping me off at Earth in an hour? I have to meet her for dinner...."

"That's two favors, Kif. But I suppose.... That way I can meet up with the luscious Leela before she too goes to war...."

"Or you could just take her out of the war, too...." Kif suggested.

"I'm not Superman, Kif. I finally agreed to let women join so I'm not going to start taking all of them out. Amy will be the one exception.... along with another certain lady I got acquainted with.... Besides, with Leela in the war she will be much closer to me then she is on Earth.... Now, lets get going, chop chop!"

Kif sighed, grabbed the controls and started steering the Nimbus over to Earth.

And Back On Earth....

Michelle grabbed the bag, holding her veil and shoes and draped the dress, covered in protective plastic, over her arm. "Thanks for helping me pick out a dress, Leela."

"Don't mention it." Ever. She added mentally.

"No I really appreciate it. Come on, lets go to the mall. It's the least I can do."

"I really should be getting back to work now-"

"Come on, it'll be fun."

"No really, I-"

"It will be fun." Michelle insisted.

Leela sighed. "Fine. But only for a little while."

"Great! Lets go!" She grabbed Leela's arm again and they headed off.

How the Hell does Fry stand her? Leela wondered.

Selling The Caviar-Bot of Annoyance

Fry knocked on the door of yet another house, hoping to finally get rid of the stupid solid gold butler.

Hattie McDoogal was the one who opened the door. "What do you want?" she asked.

"Hi, I'm trying to sell this solid gold butler. Would you by any chance be interested?" Fry asked.

"I don't know... If you're selling it then what's wrong with it?"

Fry shrugged "Nothing. It was just taking up too much space for me...."

"Hmm.." Hattie looked at the robot, closely.

"More caviar, sir?" Asked the butler.

"What? I'm not a man! This robot clearly needs its eyes checked!"

"Uh... I think it was talking to your cat." Fry told her.

"Mittens?" She picked up her cat and held it up.

"Yeah, Mittens."

"More caviar, sir?"

Hattie put the cat down. "So nice to see a robot who doesn't despise my cat."

"So... are you gonna buy it?"

"How much?"

Fry looked down. "Uh...a hundred thousand dollars..." He said quietly.

"A hundred thousand!? Absolutely not!" Hattie started to close her door but Fry stuck his foot by the door-frame so it wouldn't close.

"Please? Its genuine 24 carat gold!"

"No! Move your foot!" She tried slamming the door shut but all that did was make Fry scream.

"OW! Stoppit!"

"Move your damn foot!" She slammed the door again.

"OW! Fine, fine! But good luck finding a solid gold butler for less!" Fry moved his foot away from the door and Hattie shut it, making sure she had all the locks on.

Fry sighed and started to walk off with the robot.

"More caviar, sir?"

"Quiet, you!" Fry kicked the robot but made the mistake of using the same foot he used to block the door. "OW! Man, this is not my day...."

Leela, The Mall and The Two Biggest Pains Imaginable

Leela sighed as Michelle window shopped her way through the mall.

"You know I really do have to get back to work."

"Just tell them you were sick. This is your chance to have fun! Lord knows if you ever did before...."

Leela narrowed her eye. "I can have fun! I'm just busy a lot."

"Maybe you're just taking the breakup a little hard..."

"Breakup?"

"Sean told me he had to dump you."

"Sean told you he dumped me?"

"Yeah, I'm sorry it didn't work out."

Leela gritted her teeth.

"Oh, you're so tense. You gonna be alright?" Michelle said with an overly nice tone.

"Oh yeah. Just fine." Leela replied, teeth still gritted.

"Did he at least let you down easy?"

"He didn't dump me! I dumped him!"

"Of course you did."

Leela was about to wring her neck when her Wrist-O-Matic 5000 beeped. She pressed the button to accept the call but soon regretted it.

"Why hello, Leela. What a sensuous surprise." Zapp said on the other line.

"You called me. Its not a surprise."

"Er...yes. Well, that aside, I propose we go on a date."

"I propose we don't. Goodbye." She was about to hang up on him when Michelle stopped her.

"Zapp?" She asked.

"Oh, hi Monique."

"Michelle."

"Er...right."

Michelle crossed her arms. "What are you doing talking to Leela? Don't tell me you forgot about me."

Leela interrupted them. "Uh... Michelle, what do you care about Zapp? You're marrying Fry!"

"I need a backup plan, don't I?"

"So Zapp is your backup plan?" Leela shuddered. "I was with him once now I'm turned off for life!"

"Turned off anyone else?" Zapp asked.

"Turned off you, idiot."

"What? No one can resist the Zapper! I've traced where you are and I'll be there in no time." The call ended and Leela shook her fists.

"God, I can't stand him! I'm going now!" Leela started off but Michelle stopped her yet again.

"You can't go yet! Don't leave me here with Zapp!"

"Regretting your choice, are you? Well that's too bad! You cheated on Fry, you get your justice at last! See ya!" She waved Michelle off and walked away -right into Zapp. "Son of a- how'd you get here so fast?"

"Fortunately I was already hovering over the mall when I called you. I had but to land and find you."

Leela shoved him roughly aside. She'd had just about enough of this.. "Go talk to Little Miss Annoying over there. You're a great match. Now I'm out of here!" She stormed off, leaving Zapp and Michelle alone.

"So..." Zapp started. "Has the craving set in on you yet?"

Michelle growled and stomped away.

"Eh, she'll be back."

Over To Fry...

"I'll never sell this stupid thing!" Fry exclaimed, as he started to walk away from the fifteenth house he had visited that day. No luck. He started down the stairs but his foot gave out and he fell down the rest of the way. 

"Ow! Ooh! Ow! Owch!" He sighed, lying at the base of the steps. "I really should stop using that same foot to block the doors..."

"More caviar, sir?"

"Shut the hell up!" Fry yelled, using the railing to help him get back up. "Its really not helping!" He looked around. He was near a small area with a bar, an alien pawn shop, a- wait a second! "The pawn shop!" He started limping towards the shop, making sure the robot followed.

Once inside he immediately went over to the clerk. "How much can you give me for this solid gold butler?"

The clerk looked the robot over. "Hmm. How many carats?"

"24."

"Looks to be in good shape. I can go as high as 90 thousand."

"Can you maybe think of going as high as 100 thousand?" Fry asked hopefully.

"I like your spunk. But no. 90 thousand take it or leave it."

"Please?"

"No."

"Okay fine. 90 thousand."

"Very good, sir. Anything else you have to pawn today?" The clerk asked, handing Fry the money.

"Guess not..." The clerk went back to pricing merchandise and Fry limped off.

"Well... only ten thousand to go..."

"You need ten thousand dollars?" Bender asked, walking down the street.

"Yeah, but you've been no help before so there's no point in asking now."

"Well someone's in a good mood. I was going to give you this ten thousand I have right here," -He points to several wads of money in his chest compartment- "But now I'm not so sure...."

Fry gasped. "Where'd you get ten thousand dollars?"

"My good pal Roberto let me have half his share of insurance we "collected" today, 50 thousand smackers! Bought me a golden antenna top-" He points to the top of his antenna which is now golden- "And enough beer to last a week!"

"That doesn't seem like a lot."

"Well the guy said it would last a year but I bet I could drink it in a week.... So you want the rest of the money or what?"

"Really, why?"

Bender took a puff from a cigar he was holding and shrugged. "Meh, I need to make room for more robbing. Roberto and I are having a contest to see who can steal the most money from the same bank." He gave Fry the money and headed over to the bank, pulling on a burglary mask.

"Yes! At last, a hundred thousand dollars! Now all I have to do is book the Madison Cube Garden for a week from today and I'm home free!" Fry started to limp over to the bus stop for the Madison Cube Garden but something was bugging him. "Huh... I feel like I'm forgetting something...." 

He passed by a flower shop with roses in the window. He blinked, trying to remember. "Well if I'm forgetting it then it must be nothing...."

An Unwanted Visitor

Kif walked nervously into Elzar's and looked around for Amy.

"Kif!" she exclaimed and waved him over to her table. "You made it!"

"Wouldn't miss it for the world."

"So Zapp let you come?"

"Yes. He must be in a good mood for some reason."

"Are those flowers for me?" Amy asked, pointing to the flowers in Kif's hands.

"O-oh right. Yes th-they are." He handed her the flowers but his camouflage reflex started to act up. "Oh my..."

"It's okay, Kif. It's how I know you're happy to see me." Amy smiled and put the flowers down on the table. "Any news on the wars?"

Kif sat down. "Well we can't stop them from happening but now all different sides of the wars are gonna strike at once so I guess its like one war...."

"Well... I'm sure it'll all work out...."

"Oh! I almost forgot! I got Zapp to take you out of the war so you won't be killed."

"Oh, Kiffy! Thank you!" She hugged him so hard his head inflated a little as she squeezed.

"Hope I'm not interrupting anything." Zapp said, grabbing a chair, a plate and some food off of someone's table as he walked over to them.

"Uh, well acually- uh, um...."

"Good." Zapp quickly began stuffing his face full of food.

"Uh.. sir.. what happened to- weren't you going to, um... go somewhere else?"

"Well yes but I decided against that plan. Now I'll just spend some quality time with my loyal lieutenant- you."

"But, sir... I'm on a date."

"Yeah!" Amy spoke up now. "So leave us alone!"

"I took you out of the war, I can put you back." Zapp told Amy. "But anyway I have to go, I'm not needed on Earth right now and we have a lot of war preparations to do."

"We?" Kif asked, wondering why Zapp would include himself in working.

"I mean you. You have a lot of war preparations to do. Lets get going." Zapp grabbed Kif and started to walk back to the Nimbus.

"But... oh..." Kif sighed. "We'll go out when the war's over, Amy, I promise!" If I survive....

The Next Day

Fry sat down in the couch at the lounge at PE. "At last... I get to relax." 

Michelle came charging through the doors and Fry almost screamed. "Well good thing this is just a dream...."

"I'm not a dream!" She yelled and Fry flinched. "Did you get the Madison Cube Garden booked?"

"Yep."

"And a band?"

"The Robot Devil said he would get his minions to play for us."

"Good. What about the roses?"

"The what?"

"The roses, Fry! The blue roses?"

"Uh...."

"Ugh, you didn't get them did you? Leave it to you to mess up a simple task like buying flowers! Honestly I-"

Shut up already and leave me alone! He wanted to say but decided against it. "Fine! I'll get them!"

"Maybe I should just call the whole thing off...."

Fry turned around. "Really?" He asked hopefully.

"No, its okay, Fry. I won't call it off. I was just thinking. The wedding's still on."

"Oh goodie..." Fry sighed and took a step to the door but fell over. "Stupid foot...."

"Get UP!" Michelle screeched and Fry scrambled up and ran as best he could to the door.

Zoidberg looked up from a boot he was chewing on. "A little hard on him you're being, maybe?" He said.

"I am not! If I don't keep pushing him he'll never get anything done!" She shot back, taking a step towards Zoidberg.

Zoidberg shoved the rest of the boot in his mouth and huddled over. "Alright, alright. Don't eat me!"

Michelle sighed and sat down. "The future sure is rude...."

Leela entered the lounge and narrowed her eye at Michelle. "Michelle." She said coldly.

"Leela." Michelle replied in a similar tone.

"Zoidberg!" Zoidberg said, just wanting to be in the conversation.

"Well your wedding's coming up. Good for that." Leela said with the same flat, cold expression.

"Yes. Good."

"So... where's Fry?"

"Finding me some blue roses."

"Blue roses... alright then..." She paused for a moment then headed for the door but it was the professor who stopped her this time.

"You're not going anywhere! I need you to deliver this package! Fry's gone and Bender's taking a "sick day" so you're the only one left."

"What about Zoidberg?"

"Yeah! What about Zoidberg!" Zoidberg asked, standing up.

"No, I need Zoidberg to look at this growth on my back. Wanna see?" The Professor started to pull his shirt up but Leela stopped him.

"Uh... no thanks. I'll just deliver the package. Who's it to?"

"Zapp Brannigan. Its his order of 50 pairs of velor socks."

"Oh what a lovely week I'm having." Leela sighed sarcastically. 

The Professor shoved the package in her hands."Quit bragging about your week and get going already!"

The Hunt For Blue Roses

Fry gazed at the rows and rows of different coloured flowers as he stepped into the flower shop. They seemed to have every kind imaginable.

"Can I help you, sir?" A store worker asked.

"Uh, yeah. Can I get a bouquet of roses with the colours red, white and blue?"

"Well we don't have any blue roses already made but we can genetically engineer some. It'll cost you, though."

"Okay... how much?"

"50 dollars per flower."

"And how many blue roses do I have to get for a wedding bouquet?"

"The standard bouquet has 2 flowers per colour but you might wanna go for three."

"What? I'm not paying $150 for flowers!"

"That's just the blue ones. The whole thing'll cost you $290."

"Two hundred ninety-" Fry sighed and opened his wallet only to find a note saying: SORRY, MEATBAG. NEEDED MONEY FOR BRIBING. -BENDER. He sighed again. "I'll go get the money somehow. Can you just put the flowers on hold for now?"

"Okay, but our policy is: if you don't come to pick them up within 24 hours, you're screwed. Well, come back, soon!"

Fry sighed and walked out the door- as best he could because his foot still felt like it was broken. "Great. More money problems. Can't I get a break?" He stumbled down the sidewalk, hoping that a miraculous money-making idea would hit him when he noticed some change in the gutter. Two dollars worth. "Well that's two dollars down... only-" He counted on his fingers. "-288 to go. I need a miracle...."

He passed by a 7(exponent)11 and paused. "Well... may as well get a lottery ticket. Who knows... its about time my luck turned." He bought a scratch'n sniff ticket with the money he found. He crossed his fingers. "Please, please, please...."

He scratched the first one. "Pine tree.... Pine tree.... Cherry. Damn! Where were you last week, stupid cherry!" He was about to rip up the ticket when the clerk stopped him.

"Wait! That's one of the winning combinations!"

"It is?"

"Yes."

"Really?"

"Yes."

"Really?"

"Yes! Just claim your prize already!" The clerk was getting annoyed.

"Cool! What'd I win?"

"A coupon for two free bouquets of flowers at the flower shop down the road."

"Aw, man... I needed $290 for- Wait a second!" Fry grabbed the coupon and headed over to the flower shop.

"Okay! I'll pick up those roses now!" He announced, handing the coupon to the worker.

"Very well then, would you like to get your free second bouquet now or later?"

"Later." Fry took the flowers and headed over to the bus stop back to P.E. Maybe he could catch Leela before the end of the day. He didn't know how he'd confront her but he just felt that somehow they had to work things out. He dug in his pocket for the note she had written for him the day everything went downhill. He reread it over and over. 

Fry sighed. "I'll fix things up, Leela.... Somehow it'll all work out in the end... I hope."


Stay tuned for the sixth and final part of It Never Lasts!

Buddies