Fan Fiction

Attack Of The Ponies
By Rush

Scene: Planet Express: Lounge. Fry, Leela, and Bender sit on the couch watching the news on TV with Linda and Morbo.

Morbo: [On TV] '... and that is why Morbo wishes the genocide of the whole entire Human race. Linda?

[Linda chuckles.]

Linda: 'In other news New New York is under attack by giant Ponies.

[On screen it shows giant colorful Ponies with large eyes walking around New New York firing red laser beams from their eyes; vaporizing people, blasting holes in buildings, and blowing up hover cars, and the Ponies somehow pick up people with their hooves eating them as well as stepping on people crushing them. DOOP soldiers on the ground fire their laser rifles at the Ponies, but their lasers have no effect on them.]

[Pan over to a giant grey Pony with a blond mane picking up Nibbler on screen somehow turning him into a big chocolate Muffin, then eats the Nibbler Muffin.]

Derpy Hooves: [On TV] 'Mmm, Muffins! [She then proceeds to joyfully run through buildings laughing knocking them over.]

Linda: [On TV] 'They are doing a good job aren't they?

Morbo: [On TV] 'Yes. If only my race had the honor of the genocide of the Human race.

[Leela turns off the TV using the remote.]

Leela: 'Well at least the Human race will be killed by giant cute Ponies.

Fry: [nodding his head in agreement.] 'Yeah.

Bender: 'I'm gonna miss you guys.

[Zoidberg walks in.]

Zoidberg: 'Will you miss me?

Bender: 'No!

Zoidberg: [sad] 'Awww! [A giant pink hoof bursts through the ceiling grabbing Zoidberg.] (screaming) Ahhahahah!

Cut to: Outside Planet Express. Giant Pinkie Pie somehow holding Zoidberg in her right hoof stands over Planet Express.

Zoidberg: (begging) 'Please don't eat me! [Pinkie Pie turns Zoidberg into a red cupcake and eats him.]

Pinkie Pie: [eating Zoidberg cupcake] 'Nom nom nom! Mmm, juicy! [She then picks up both screaming Fry and Leela, turning Fry into an orange cupcake and Leela into a purple cupcake.] (eating Leela and Fry as cupcakes at the same time) Nom nom nom! Mmm, they tasted sweet together. [She drives her hoof into Planet Express making a hole in the building picking up Farnworth.]

Farnworth: 'Well this is the end for me, but I always thought Pinkie Pie was best Pony.

Pinkie Pie: 'Awww, thanks. [She turns Farnworth into a moldy rotten cupcake.] Ewww! I'm not eating that. [She throws the Muffin into the sea.]

Cut to: Basement. Scruffy looks at a porno magazine entitled "Space Juggs" on the cover of the magazine it shows a hot blue Humanoid alien babe with big blue "girls".

Scruffy: 'Yep, Asari are hot.

[Pinkie Pie's hoof bursts through the ceiling grabbing Scruffy.]

Cut to: Outside Planet Express. Scruffy remains calm still paying full attention to his magazine while in Pinkie Pie's hoof.

Scruffy: 'Scruffy gonna die the way he lived. [He turns the page on his magazine.]

Pinkie Pie: [sniffing Scruffy] 'Ewww, you smell funny. [She turns Scruffy into a white cupcake causing his magazine to fall to the ground, and eats the Scruffy Cupcake.] Ewww, he tasted weird, like sweat and salt.

Scene: The What-If scenario ends. Farnsworth has been watching the whole thing on the What-If machine.]

Farnsworth: 'So that's what things would be like if the Ponies were evil and giant?

[Next to the What If Machine the normal sized Pinkie Pie sticks her head out of a pink Parabox.]

Pinkie Pie: 'Hi!

[Farnsworth screams nearly falling off his chair.]

Farnsworth: [shouting and pointing at Pinkie Pie.] 'Get back in your own universe, you talking demon Pony!

Pinkie Pie: (sad) 'Awww! [She ducks her head back into the Parabox.]

The End