Fan Fiction

Smelling Zoidberg
By Rush

Scene: Planet Express: Zoidberg's Office. Zoidberg sits on his chair with his claw feet on the table. There is a blinding flash of light followed by the appearance of U-J-Bender.]

Zoidberg: 'Whaaaat?

U-J-Bender: 'Hey Zoidberg can I smell your armpits?

Zoidberg: 'Well OK, [He stands up.] you can smell my stink glands. [Bender smells both of Zoidberg armpits, vomiting screws and nut bolts each one he smells.]

U-J-Bender: [gasping pulling his head away from Zoidberg armpit.] 'OK... just... just the-the feet now. [He smells Zoidberg's feet, and collapses unconscious.]

Zoidberg: 'I guess he couldn’t stand the smell. [The unconscious U-J-Bender disappears with a blinding flash of light.]

Scene: Wormhole Gateway Dimension To Universes. U-J-Bender still unconscious falls through the wormhole with all sorts of flashing colorers filled with mostly grandfather-clocks and cuckoo-clocks constantly going off plus hundreds of other different types of clocks.

[There is a flash of light and U-J-Bender disappears.]

Scene: Mount Everest. U-J-Bender appears on top of Mount Everest, then slips and falls down, his body hits off rocks as he falls down the mountain, but he still remains unconscious. About halfway down the mountain he disappears in a blinding flash of light.

Cut to: New York. Fry holding a pizza box outside Applied Cryogenics sees his bike being stolen.

Bike Thief: 'Happy new year! [U-J-Bender falls from the sky landing on top of the Bike Thief knocking him off the bike at the same time making a bone breaking sound.] (screaming in pain) Ahahahaahahaha ow oww ow ow! [U-J-Bender disappears with a blinding flash of light.]

Cut to: Luna Park: Moon Street USA. Bender is seen finishing off a bottle beer, then shoves it into Crater Face's eye.]

Crater Face: 'At least I still have my self respect! [He chuckles to himself then cries, and then U-J-Bender falls on him knocking him over.] Ow! [U-J-Bender disappears in a blinding flash of light.]

Cut to: Planet Express: Lounge. Bender with five o'clock rust groans and falls onto the couch. Leela follows him in.]

Bender: 'Leave me alone!

Leela:' Look at that five o'clock rust. You've been up all night not drinking, haven't you? [U-J-Bender falls through the ceiling narrowly missing her.] (shouting) What the hell?! [U-J-Bender disappears in a blinding flash of light.] What was that?!

Cut to: Planet Express: Ship's Cockpit. The fuel gauge fills up, Leela throttles forward and the ship lifts off Vergon 6 , moments before the ground collapses. They fly away from the planet and it explodes. The crew cheer.]

Leela: We made it! [She looks through a pair of binoculars.] And some of the animals survived. [She looks through the binoculars and sees some animals standing on a tiny fragment of rock, then a U-J-Bender falls on a light blue duck like animal knocking it off the rock.] Oh my God! [U-J-Bender disappears in a blinding flash of light.]

Scene: Planet Express: Ship's Cockpit. Fry and Leela are standing in front of the couch looking out of the windscreen into open space.]

Leela: 'What do you think of the view Fry?

Fry: 'It really puts things in perspective. I mean, from up here an entire world can seem utterly insignificant. [A small planet splats onto the windscreen like a fly onto a car. And there is a blinding flash of light above Fry, followed by the appearance of U-J-Bender falling on top of Fry knocking him over.] Ow! [Leela pulls U-J-Bender off Fry.]

Leela: [helping Fry up] 'Are you alright Fry?

Fry: 'Yeah I'm OK.

Leela: 'This Bending Unit seems unconscious, I think I know how to wake him up though. [She kicks U-J-Bender's ass.]

U-J-Bender: 'Ow! I should have never have done that bet that other U-J-Bender told me to do! [He disappears with a blinding flash of light.]

Fry: 'What the hell is a U-J-Bender?

Leela: 'I don't know. [She presses a button and the windscreen wiper cleans the tiny planet off.]

The End