Fan Fiction

U-J-Bender High Up A Mountain
By Rush

Scene: There is a blinding flash of light, followed by U-J-Bender appearing high up a mountain during a blizzard.

U-J-Bender: 'What universe am I in now? [A wooden sigh post blowing in the wind hits U-J-Bender knocking him over.] (shouting) Ow! [He rubs snow off the sigh to reveal it to say: "Welcome To Skyrim".] (confused) Eh? [There is a loud roar, followed by a Dragon flying down from the sky towards U-J-Bender.] (shouting) Ohhh crap! [U-J-Bender while screaming runs down the mountain from side to side dodging the Dragon as it breathes fire while chasing him.] (screaming) Ahaahahahahah, I miss Mount Everest now! [A cave opening can be seen up ahead on the side of the mountain.] A cave? I'm saved! [U-J-Bender rushes into the cave.]

Cut to: Darkness. U-J-Bender lights a match to reveal a dozen living skeletons holding weapons like swords and axes looking at him.

Cut to: Outside Cave. Bender runs out from the cave screaming with the skeletons chasing him, the Dragon appears to be gone.

U-J-Bender: (shouting) 'Go away, leave me alone! [An arrow fired from a skeleton with a bow hits him in the ass.] Ow! [It isn't too long when the skeletons give up and walk back to the cave.] Phew! [Up ahead two heavily armed men and one woman all wearing heavy steel plated armour with horned helmets walk up the mountain, but then stop in and look at U-J-Bender.] Oh no!

Pan to: The two men and woman.

Man #1: (deep voice) 'What in Oblivion is that?

Man #2: (deep voice)'I don't know.

Woman (deep voice) 'Maybe it's one of those Dwemer robots? [U-J-Bender disappears with a blinding flash of light.] A magical Dwemer robot?

Man #2: 'I've never seen a Dwemer robot like that before.

Man #1: 'Shouldn’t it have been attacking us?

Woman: 'Maybe it's not the attacking type.

Man #2: 'Right, now let's get some booty in that cave up ahead.

The End