Fan Fiction

Universe Jumping Bender, part 5
By Rush

Scene: Wormhole Gateway Dimension To Universes. Bender falls through the wormhole, meeting, hundreds, thousands, if not millions, or even billions of Benders who disappear and appear, smoking, drinking and look at pornos and other robots that have suffered the same fate by Professor Hubert J. Farnsworths same invention from uncountable other realities and more being created as we speak because that invention that creates universes.

[With a flash of light U-J-Bender disappears.]

Scene Orbiting Meadows National Cemetery. Fry is about to put the clover back in the grave. But then out of nowhere U-J-Bender appears standing beside him.

Fry: [gasps] 'What? How can you be here?

U-J-Bender: 'Don't ask questions! I'm just product of my or someone else's imagination or yours. So Fry , keep that clover it might give you luck.

[With a flash of light U-J-Bender disappears.]

Fry: 'Yeah, maybe I'll keep it.

[Fry runs after Bender and Leela.]

Fry: (shouting) 'Hey Leela, want to go out for dinner later?

Leela: (shouting) 'Alright Fry it's a date, we might do a bit more after. You know sex!

Fry: (thinking) 'Wow! This clover sure gives you luck. Bit what if lose it?

Three weeks later.

Scene: Apartment 1 I: Leela's Bedroom. Leela who's hair is in a mess lies sleeping next to Fry, both in the nude the blanket covering them.

Fry: (thinking) 'Well, I lost the clover. But Leela still loves me without it.

[Fry cuddles up to Leela and falls asleep instantly.]

Scene: Mount Everest. U-J-Bender appears on top of Everest, slips and falls down.

U-J-Bender: (screaming)'Again with the falling!--[hits his head against the mountain]Ow! Ahhhhhhhhhhhh--[takes a breath] Ahhhhhhhhhhhh--[hits his head against the mountain]Ow! Ahhhhhhhhhhhh--[takes a breath] Ahhhhhhhhhhhh--[hits his head against the mountain]Ow!

There is a flash of light and U-J-Bender disappears.

Scene: New New York City Street. Fry and Leela are in an alcove. Santa flies his sleigh around ready for the kill. Leela tries a door but it's locked.

Leela: 'We're trapped.

Fry: 'I never thought it would end this way: Gunned down by Santa Claus. Honestly, I didn't see it coming!

Santa gets closer. Fry and Leela crouch down in a corner.

Leela: 'Goodbye, Fry.

Fry: 'Goodbye, Leela. [They hug.] Hey, look, we're under the mistletoe.

Leela looks up and they both look at each other. They move towards each other to kiss.

Santa: 'Your mistletoe is no match for my T.O.W. missile!

Santa is about to shoot at them but then, gasps seeing U-J-Bender appear in the seat next to him. Fry and Leela kiss deeply. The parrot flies past the alcove followed by U-J-Bender falling from the sky landing on the ground.

U-J-Bender: (angrily) 'Kicks me out does he? [looks over at Fry and Leela making out in the alcove under a mistletoe.] Whoa! What I miss?

There is flash of light and U-J-Bender disappears.

Cut to: Closeup to Fry and Leela making out. Leela breaks the kiss.

Leela: 'So, where's my present, Fry?

Fry: (sad) 'Leela, I'm sorry I lost it, the bird flew off on me.

Leela: [hugs him and pats him on the back] 'There there, it's the thought that counts. Now, let's get the hell outta here!

Sometime later: Fry and Leela come running down the street.

Fry: (shouting) Help!

Leela: (shouting) Somebody help us.

Tinny Tim: 'It's humans. Shall we mug them, robot sir?

Bender: 'No, wait, I know these guys. They got nothing.

Bender runs towards Fry and Leela. Santa flies over them.

Santa: 'Ho, ho, ho! [Bender panics.] You've been very naughty, Bender.

Bender: 'What? Me? I didn't do nothing. You're thinking of the kid.

[Bender points at Tinny Tim.]

Santa: 'My God, Bender! Framing an orphan? That's so naughty I'll have to add it to my list right now. [He pulls a list out and starts writing.] Framing ... I-N-G ... [The robots, Fry and Leela run away.] ... an...

Scene: Planet Express: Attic Room. Amy, Hermes, Farnsworth and Zoidberg are sat under the Xmas tree exchanging gifts.

Zoidberg: 'Amy, this is for you. A set of combs for your beautiful hair.

Amy: 'Oh, that's so sweet. But I sold my hair to a wigmaker so I could buy a set of combs for Hermes.

She pulls her hat off revealing she is bald.

Hermes: 'Oh, the irony. I sold my hair so I could buy this third set of combs for Zoidberg.

He pulls his hat off. He is also bald.

Zoidberg: 'Thank you. These'll come in handy for my new hair. [He pulls his hat off. Amy's and Hermes' hair is grafted to his head.] Finally I look as pretty as I feel!

Fry, Leela and Bender: (shouting; from outside) 'Helllllllllp!

The staff look through the window. Fry, Leela and the robots are still being chased by Santa. They run towards the Planet Express building.

Farnsworth: 'Oh, dear. They'll be killed on our doorstep. And there's no trash pickup until January 3rd.

Fry, Leela and the robots rush in. There is a crash on the roof.

Hermes: 'Sweet manatee of Galilee! He's on the roof!

Farnsworth: 'Quick! The armour-plated chimney cover! [Fry and Leela run over to the cover and start to push it. It moves very slowly.] Push! Push!

Bender: 'Use teamwork!

The chimney is nearly covered when Santa sticks a candy cane through a gap and rolls the cover back. The staff gasp. Santa and the reindeer fly in.

Tinny Tim: 'Oh, dear! Oh, dear!

Hermes dives behind the sofa.

Santa: 'You've all been very naughty, very naughty indeed. Apart from; Dr. Zoidberg,Leela and Fry, these are for you.

He hands Zoidberg a gift, hands Fry and a small box marked "Sperm Regrowth Pills" under "Don't ask your doctor. Just take all of them at once." and hands Leela a red stress ball.

Zoidberg: 'A pogo-stick!

Fry: 'I can [opens the box, and takes them all at once] be a dad.

Leela: 'I always wanted one of these.

Zoidberg giggles and bounces around the room.

Santa: 'As for the rest of you, I..I...ah, um... Ahh, too many of you in here have been good. And I don't want to kill you in the crossfire. So good bye.

[Santa sits back down his sleigh and flies out the window breaking the glass. ]

Scene: Planet Express: Meeting Room. The Planet Express staff, LaBarbara and the homeless robots are sat around the table talking.

Farnsworth: 'Yes, good thing I got us out of that one!

Bender brings a covered plate in from the kitchen.

Bender: 'I'm sorry everyone but there's no Xmas dinner.

Tinny Tim: 'I was looking forward to this!

Zoidberg: 'Yeah! Me too!

Fry: 'One, you always look forward to food Zoidberg. Two the food isn't what's important.

Tinny Tim: 'I'm so hungry.

Fry: 'The important thing is we're all together for Xmas. And even though I'm surrounded by robots and monsters and old people, I've never felt more at home. Plus I think Leela is my girlfriend now. Right?

Leela sits down on Fry's lap and kisses his cheek.

Leela: 'You got that right.

Bender: 'Hey, I didn't need to see that! You with your two butt cheeks on Fry's lap.

Leela: 'Bender! Don't be so rude. Now let's all of us shut up and sing.

Farnsworth: 'Hear, hear! Now let's all of us shut up and sing!

Leela: 'I just said that.

Farnsworth: 'Wha? Oh right.

They gather around a piano, Apart form Leela who keeps seated on Fry's lap.

Amy: (singing) 'He knows when you are sleeping.

Farnsworth: (singing) 'He knows when you're on the can.

Leela: (singing) 'He'll hunt you down and blast your ass from here to Pakistan. [Fry wraps his arms around her] Fry? What are you[Fry kisses]Mmmmm--

Zoidberg: (singing) 'Well before that happened,Oh.

Hermes: (singing) 'You'd better not breathe, You'd better not move.

Bender: (singing) 'You're better off dead, I'm telling you, dude.

Fry: 'Mmmm.[breaks the kiss]. Santa Claus is gunning you down!

Everyone cheers. Farnsworth takes off his lab coat, exposing himself.

Farnsworth: 'Merry Xmas, everyone!

That changed around universe may be continued.

Cut to: Wormhole Gateway Dimension To Universes. Bender falls sleeping through the wormhole.

U-J-Bender: (wakes up) 'Ah, back here yet again, huh?

There is a flash of light and U-J-Bender disappears.

Scene: Orbiting Meadows National Cemetery. All the staff and plus a few other are gathered for Lars' funeral, who's on a screen finishing up his speech.

Lars: [On screen] 'So I called it off. I'm sorry, Leela.

Leela: [sad] 'I understand.

Screen: 'That con---[U-J-Bender appears behind Hermes.

Hermes: 'What in babylon?

Everyone looks at U-J-Bender wide eyed.

U-J-Bender: 'Hold it! I'm just a lost universe jumper folks. Just ignore me.

Everyone ignores him.

Fry: 'He was a good man, Leela.

Leela: 'Yeah... you were.

Leela kisses Fry on the cheek as he smiles.

U-J-Bender: (thinking) 'Aww, I see that dead meatbag over there must somehow be another Fry.

Farnsworth: 'Well, I guess that wraps everything up in a nice, paradox-free bow.

U-J-Bender: (thinking) 'Aww, he must be a T-P-D.

Bubblegum: 'Not quite, my wrinkly brother.

Nibbler: 'Right on! In order for any of this to make any sense at all, someone must make one final trip back in time to put the code on Fry's ass in the first place!

Bender: 'Sounds like a job for me, Bender.

Benders tears the tattoo off Lars and reads it.

[Bender says the time code and jumps into the time sphere.]

U-J-Bender: 'What year is it?

Nibbler: '3008.

With a flash of light U-J-Bender disappears.

Scene: New New York City Street. Crowds of people looks at the anomaly on a giant screen, Fry is standing next to Colleen.

Fry: 'Something about seeing it on the jumbotron make it so much more real.

Colleen: 'It's so scary. What are you supposed to do when the whole universe is coming to an end?

Fry: 'I have a th--[U-J-Bender falls screaming from the sky and lands on top of Colleen] Bender?!

People gasps, scream and point at U-J-Bender.

U-J- Bender: (rubs his forehead](shouting)'Oh don't mind me, I'm just a lost universe jumper chaps!

People make sounds of relief and turn their attention back to the screen.

Colleen: 'Get off me!

U-J- Bender: [stands up , followed by Colleen] 'What year is it?

Fry: '3008. [turns to Colleen] So ah--

U-J- Bender: 'Fry! Go ask Leela out, I'm sure she''ll say yes.

Fry: 'You really think so?

U-J-Bender: 'Yeaaaaah!

Fry: 'Alright, I'll do it.

Scene: Planet Express: Lounge. Leela is slumped back on the couch watching TV.

Announcer: [on TV] 'Bachelor Chow, now with whole grain goodness!

Leela changes the channel to the anomaly showing up on screen.

Announcer: [on TV] 'We are doooooooom!

Leela changes the channel to another channel about the anomaly.

Announcer: [on TV] 'The end is naai!

Leela changes the channel to yet another channel about the anomaly.

Announcer: [on TV] 'Repent your sins, for the end is near!

Leela changes the channel to yet another channel about the anomaly.

Announcer: [on TV] 'Doooooom!

She turns the TV off.

Leela: 'God! 40,000 channels and only 27 have anything good on. That's not about the anomaly....I feel like Fry. Wait! Where is Fry?

Fry walks in and sits down next to Leela.

Fry: 'Hey, Leela.

Leela: [stroking her hair] 'Hey, Fry.

Fry: 'So, Leela why don't you we go on a--

Leela: 'A Date?

Fry: 'Um, yeah.

Leela: 'Fry!

Fry: 'I'm sorr--

Leela: 'Why didn't you ask days ago?

Fry: 'Ahh, um--

Leela: 'So if wanna take me on a date, where?

Fry: 'Umm, well, I haven't actually thought about that part yet.

Leela gets up, and positions herself over Fry. Her eye is narrowed looking down over Fry as if he was a piece of meat, with the tip of her right index finger placed on his chest near his heart. Fry's eyes are open wide in confusedness.

Leela: (sexfully) 'I have a thought.

Fry: 'An impulsive thought? Leela, I don't want you to make anymore mistakes.

Leela: 'Fry, this isn't gonna be no mistake! Now, let me tell you what I have in mind.

Cut to: Robot Arms Apartments: Fry's Bedroom. Fry and Leela relax in bed, she rests her head on his shoulder and has her hair down. A blanket covers them both and their cloths is scattered all over the room.

Fry: 'I Love you, Leela.

Leela: 'I Love you too, Fry. But you know Fry?

Fry: 'What?

Leela: 'We can't stay in a place like this forever.

Fry: 'Okay. So how along do you want us to start looking for apartments?

Leela: 'A few mounts from now.

Fry: 'Alright.

Leela moves closer to Fry cuddling up against him, in so doing a lot of her hair covers his face.

Leela: (very softy) 'Fry?

[Leela gently kisses his cheek.]

Leela: (very softy) 'You wanna go again?

Fry: 'I'm up to it, yeah.

Cut to: Bender's And Fry's Lounge. Bender is slumped back on the couch watching TV, eating popcorn drenched in motor oil, and drinking a bottle of "Jameson Whisky" plus smoking a cigar. Tom And Jerry is on TV. Tom with a sledgehammer chases after Jerry in a grassy meadow on a hot summer's day.

Bender: 'Go on Tom! Kill that jerk mouse! [hears Leela moaning in Fry's room] Hey! Keep it down in there! I'm try'nna watch cartoons!

That changed around universe may be continued.

Cut to: Wormhole Gateway Dimension To Universes. Bender falls through the wormhole reading a circuit diagram.

U-J-Bender: Huh? Wha? Seen it before.

There is a flash of light and U-J-Bender disappears.